Are PRIDE and FEAR destroying our relationships?

{Note to my friends out there who read this and support me, thank you. Today I received word that I am qualified to hold two certifications for personal training. Whoo hoo!}

That was just a side note to all my friends and family who have been wanting to know my status. Now on to another topic which I have been wanting to write about for some time.

Today I wanted to focus on how pride or the lack of, and fear, can make or break our relationships. 

 What is this pride? 

PRIDE

See also Humble, Humility; Money; Riches; Vain, Vanity; Worldliness

A lack or absence of humility or teachableness. Pride sets people in opposition to each other and to God. A proud person sets himself above those around him and follows his own will rather than God’s will. Conceit, envy, hardheartedness, and haughtiness are also typical of a proud person.

found here:https://www.lds.org/scriptures/gs/pride

I have had experience with both in my lives. (Who hasn't ?)

Let's be frank, shall we? The people in my life who have not been full of pride are the ones who were the greatest people I have ever met. They were teachable. If I were to ask them to do something that could improve our relationship, they would kindly consider my input, and then put into action the change. This ALWAYS created more harmony and I in turn looked at them with higher regard. I would actually stand in awe that they could be so strong and confident in themselves to let go of pride.

For example: A working husband comes home, tired. He leaves his work behind and lays down on the  couch. A wife, also tired from her constant running around with children and household duties sees him there. She kisses his cheek but wishes he would help kids with homework so that she can finish making dinner. Later that evening she tells him this is what she feels could strengthen their relationship. Instead of arguing, he simply helps her from then on. 

• How quick are the children of men lifted up in pride:Hel. 12:4–5;

Now, the opposite is also true. (which is so frustrating because these people ALWAYS got it wrong. I think they believed that if they did "not back down" and "proved their point" that they would be respected more, honoured more and be the "big man" so to speak.) Whenever someone would try to make a positive change or suggest a correction in attitude or behaviour, they would not let go of pride. This has cost them many relationships, pushing away those who would love them deeper and stronger. (Which is what they really wanted in the end and most of them are lonely, confused, hurt and angry).

FEAR

See also Courage, Courageous; Faith; Reverence

Fear can have two meanings: (1) to fear God is to feel reverence and awe for him and to obey his commandments; (2) to fear man, mortal dangers, pain, and evil is to be afraid of such things and to dread them. https://www.lds.org/scriptures/gs/fear?lang=eng&letter=f

I also think that FEAR can also come across as PRIDE. My loved one has a relationship but is often sabotaging it. This person longs to be loved, respected, admired, have a best friend they can trust, but…they have closed their heart for fear of being hurt. (If you think I am talking about you, I probably am ;) but this has also affected me too.) I do know that loving deep inside and then having your heart torn apart in an instant is crushing. I also know the way love feels when all guard is down, trusting the other,  letting go to the silliness inside that lifts you and saying all the "cheesy" things like in the movies - (I do love "cheese"!) work's! Your spirit lifts, soars and refuses to come down to the complacency that everyone else knows as "life". 

• God hath not given us the spirit of fear:2 Tim. 1:7;

For example: Husband comes home wanting to hold his wife, tell her about his day, but does not because they haven't really had that kind of relationship in years. He fears to make the change.

OR

Wife wants to be held, wants to feel magic and sparks, but then refuses to let her husband touch her for fear she will just be let down, or let him down.

It goes both ways.

I only speak what I have experienced. I too have things I need to work on. Everyone does. The yes tpart about life is that we keep getting chances every single day until we are called back home. So today I will make a new life correction and if I fail, I will wake up, pray for forgiveness and help to succeed and try again. (Just like how we learned to walk, to ride a bike, to feed ourselves).

You and I do not have to simply live. We can be happy, we can "Love like we'll never get hurt". Please take the chance, let go of pride and fear. Allow love to change you. I will too. ;>